Game day isn’t just about football. It’s about tradition. It’s about friendship. It’s about questionable decisions made in a parking lot at 10 a.m. And nothing says “we’re here to party” louder than a beer bong strapped up and ready for action.
If you want to tailgate like an amateur, bring chips and dip. If you want to tailgate like a LEGEND, bring a beer bong. Here’s how to make sure your pregame is one for the history books.
1. Pick Your Weapon of Mass Consumption
Not all beer bongs are created equal. Don’t show up with a sad, leaky funnel from your garage. Be the hero your squad deserves:
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Single Hose Beer Bong – The OG. Perfect for quick warm-ups before kickoff.
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Double Hose Beer Bong – Because nothing says rivalry like racing your buddy while everyone chants “CHUG, CHUG, CHUG!”
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Quad Hose Beer Bong – For when your group believes in chaos and democracy at the same time.
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Valves – Like training wheels, but for drunk people. Start, stop, and avoid baptizing yourself in Coors Light.
2. Clean It… or at Least Pretend To
A sticky, mystery-flavored tube is a hard pass. Give your beer bong a rinse before you hit the lot. Bonus points if you bust out a bottle of water between rounds. You’ll look like the responsible one—even if you’re double-fisting Jell-O shots.
3. Ice-Cold or Bust
Warm beer bong beer is basically a war crime. Load up on coolers and ice like you’re prepping for a hurricane. And here’s the move: stash the funnel and tubes in the cooler before kickoff. Nothing says “I care about you, bro” like a crisp, frosty beer hitting your soul at 9:30 a.m.
4. Know Your Limits (Seriously)
Look, we love beer bongs as much as anyone, but too much alcohol is never a good look. Chugging three in a row might feel legendary in the moment—but you don’t want to be the guy face-down on the cornhole boards by noon. Hydrate, eat some food, and pace yourself. Remember: the goal is maximum fun, not maximum regret.
5. Create the Hype
A beer bong isn’t just a drinking tool—it’s a rallying cry. Fire up the music, get the crowd chanting, and turn your tailgate into the unofficial pregame show. The beer bong is your mic, and the parking lot is your stage. Perform accordingly.
Final Play
Tailgating without a beer bong? That’s just called standing around with snacks. Don’t be that guy. Bring the funnel, bring the fun, and tailgate like a pro.
Stock up on the ultimate party gear at BeerBong.com before game day. Your liver might hate you, but your friends will build a statue in your honor.
